So...wanna hear about my day?

[falcongrrl]

This has been a pretty bad Monday, but I've found lots of things to be grateful for in the midst of it all.

I was going to blog all of it, but i think I'll just share the condensed version that i IM'ed to S.

hope everyone else has had a better, less exciting day!


S says:
How are ya?

P says:
it's been kind of a crazy day. i was just about to try to blog it, but i'm thinking it may go long, lol. do you want the condensed version?

S says:
*grin* Yep - words of one syllable will do fine

P says:
probably tough to be that condensed...

S says:
(Just leave out the adjectives and adverbs, then) And as for those damn gerunds...

P says:
one of our cars is in the shop. i was coming back from dropping hubby off at work and my son at preschool, when i got pulled over.

S says:
Uh-oh.

P says:
unknown to me, during a lapse in insurance coverage, my license was suspended.

S says:
Uh-oh, again...

P says:
so, i got a ticket for speeding, and for driving with a suspended licence. and a reminder that i could have been arrested and my daughter taken into protective custody, had i been knowingly (oops there's a pesky adverb) driving on a suspended (adj) license.

S says:
(I'm laughing here, because this sounds like one of those Lit stories where you give the cop a blowjob and he lets you go with a smile on his face)

P says:
(adverbs and adjectives are pretty indespensible at times)

S says:
(I know)

P says:
rofl, i actually caught myself thinking that, you...but there were cops all around, my dtr was in the backseat, and he didn't seem like the type to go for it. (ie, not like you, rofl)

S :
*laughs* Cops all around, hmmm? So this is a gangbang story, then...
Anyway. Moving on...

P says:
i wouldn't have anyway; i'm not that sleazy, but the funny thing was i did think of it, just randomly, y'know?

S says:
Hey, I would be amazed if you hadn't, frankly. You have signed the Pervert's Pledge, after all.

P says:
anyway, they confiscated both my license and the tag of my car, and sent me on my way. i also coincidentally had to use the bathroom really bad, was in fact, hoping they would hurry up and give me my ticket already so i could drive home. of course, at this point, i'm not able to drive due to the suspension.

so i was going to take the bus, per their recommendation. i didn't have a cell phone to call anyone to get me. So I took E out of the car seat, and as i turned around the bus went by; i had just missed it. I didn't want to sit out by the bus stop for 30 minutes w/a two year old (for fear she would run out into the road), so i started walking, carrying her. i walked to the nearest major intersection (not sure how far, maybe 1/2 a mile), a toddler in my arms the whole way, before realizing that i had left a stroller in the car. apparently the whole ordeal had me kind of flustered (esp the part about taking my child into protective custody if i had been driving on a suspended license and knew it.)

S says:
(Wow. This is quite a tale)

P says:
i found a service station, peed finally, which was such an amazing relief it was almost orgasmic (i actually moaned, lol) and then left, remembering the guy behind the counter's admonition to lock up and turn off the lights. apparently i also *looked* like a fuck-up at this point.

S says:
*laughing*

P says:
(since he saw fit to remind me of that a couple of times before giving me the key.)

S says:
We've all been there. Most people assume I a streetperson even when I'm in my tux...

P says:
i looked across the street, saw a walgreens, and had a visa on me, so thought, fuck the stroller, i'll buy a new one here. (do you know walgreen's? a drugstore, same people who bring you wal-mart. not sure how long you were in the states.)

S says:
(Yeah, I know Walgreen's)

P says:
sooo...cross the intersection, go into walgreen's, looking for some cheapy umbrella stroller to keep me from holding the baby forever, as by this time my arms are killing me. (she's 25 pounds. and you did ask about my day.)

S says:
(I did, yeah. And well, my arms are aching just thinking about it)

P says:
walgreen's basically has huge amounts of crap masquerading as necessities. they have a special tool with which to chop up *eggs*, for god's sake, but no strollers of any type, or any other baby-carrying type devices.

i debated buying a prepaid cell phone, wondered who i would even call without feeling embarrassed, gave up, thought, fuck it, i'm almost home now, so left the store.

found a shopping cart in the parking lot that seemed to be calling my name, so put the kid in the little compartment in the front and the diaper bag in the back, and pushed her down the street, looking for all the world like some type of vagrant.

knowing that stealing a shopping cart is a felony, and hoping against hope that i wouldn't get busted and/or could talk my way out of it if i did, figuring surely no one would be so cruel as to arrest me given the circumstances.

S says:
(I am actually laughing here)

P says:
luckily i didn't get caught, though i did see a cop car on the road near me which gave me an anxious couple of minutes.

(so glad my misery can entertain you... ;-) )

so then i get to another intersection, wondering if i should stay on the main road i'm on, which is mostly business, although not (unfortunately) retail now, or turn onto a more residential road, knowing my friend M and his partner live down that way and might be able to help me, but that i'll look more obvious in this quiet little neighborhood with my baby in a shopping cart.

sooo...i went down the residential road, didn't get caught, M and G were both home, and they ushered me inside, gave us something cold to drink, and then gave us a ride to my house.

S says:
(Just for my reference, how far did you actually walk with the baby?)

P says:
M is my alcoholic friend, and he was a tad irritated i think, since i haven't been returning his calls a lot (kinda like, oh, so you want my help NOW) but G, surprisingly, since at times he's hated/been jealous of me, was very cool, saying, "any time you need a ride, let me know. it's the least i can do, considering how many times you've helped M." which is true, i have given M about
a zillion rides.

i have no idea, maybe a couple of miles or so?

i'd time it, but gee...i can't drive now until my court date, which is 6/24.

S says:
Wow, really? That really sucks.

P says:
so anyway, we now have one car w/no tag and another one in the shop. i'm at home, calling hubby to tell him what's going on, when....are you ready for this....?

S says:
(Imagine me bracing myself, with a large glass of Sancerre)

P says:
i was supposed to pay the power bill online, and i forgot, so right at this time the FUCKING POWER GOES OUT.

S says:
Okay, that's really not fair.

P says:
it is kind of funny, all laid out like this.

i was doing fine until then, but that threatened to undo me completely.

S says:
I'm not surprised! I would have been positively certifiable at that stage.

P says:
so...next my daughter fell asleep. D called, paid the bill, but it was still a couple of hours before they turned the power back on. in the meantime, i ate a couple of sandwiches, and drank a couple of beers. i figured i deserved them at that point, lol. then my daughter woke up.

so...now she's watching barney, and i'm upstairs, writing you. i was going to blog what happened, but if it's ok w/you i'll probably just post this. i'll take out your name and replace it with something suitably smarmy or perverse.

S says:
*grin* Please do!

P says:
well, i was thinking more that i needed something to take the edge off.

off the day, lol.

since then, nothing much eventful has happened. made arrangements to get my son home from preschool, and D is still working on the other car logistics.

S says:
Well, that is one bad day. I am amazed you're so good-humoured.

(snipped rest of IM)

Actually, right now I'm feeling bad, irresponsible, less-than, all that fun stuff. If I were the type of person who could remember to (fill in the blank with appropriate-sounding phrase here), then none of this would have happened.

But, as L (the preschool teacher) says, "It does not define your worth as a person."

Perhaps I should be a little more careful next time...to pay my bills, drive the speed limit, buy/carry a cell phone, wear tennis shoes with thick socks, take my stroller out of the car, and any other number of things that would show foresight and planning and could have helped me to avert or ameliorate this particular crisis.

But...I am who I am...

A+

Comments

[winnett.livejournal.com]

Oh Man! What a day! Drink another beer. At least you have your health?! Hope things brighten up.

Take care of yourself!

[ladyperegrine.livejournal.com]

I did! And thanks... :-)

[koogrr.livejournal.com]

Ouch! Not fun, sounds like a chaos collision, things were meant to be wrong.

[ladyperegrine.livejournal.com]

well, i just kept thinking that things could have been worse...it gave me a new appreciation for a lot of things, air conditioning and strollers being high on the list, and my daughter being at the very very top of the list.

btw...what's a chaos collision?

[koogrr.livejournal.com]

When all the chaotic things of the universe collide on you at once.