Christmas thanksgiving
Dec. 26th, 2009 10:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
falcongrrlI normally have a Dr. Seuss moment "somehow or another, Christmas came, just the same!" on Christmas Day...but this year I didn't.
It was more like a gradual realization of how grateful I am for these people in my life, how much I wish that I connected with everyone more than once a year, how grateful I am that the space between us still tugs when I do see them.
Oh, I got a lot of things I wanted, and so did the kids. A lot of it was accepting that my offerings were good enough and heartily appreciated, and letting myself truly receive - letting myself be open to the possibility of Christmas miracles. Having kids helps, but still. Letting myself feel all of it.
So there's this overlay of worry about Daniel, and either because or in spite of that there's a savoring of all those close to me, both those who are the foundation of who I would become and those - on here - who reach out to me in ways large and small. I love everyone so much.
In the end - for me personally - it's less about Christmas and more about the love. Though really, there's probably no sense in separating them, now that I think about it.
It was more like a gradual realization of how grateful I am for these people in my life, how much I wish that I connected with everyone more than once a year, how grateful I am that the space between us still tugs when I do see them.
Oh, I got a lot of things I wanted, and so did the kids. A lot of it was accepting that my offerings were good enough and heartily appreciated, and letting myself truly receive - letting myself be open to the possibility of Christmas miracles. Having kids helps, but still. Letting myself feel all of it.
So there's this overlay of worry about Daniel, and either because or in spite of that there's a savoring of all those close to me, both those who are the foundation of who I would become and those - on here - who reach out to me in ways large and small. I love everyone so much.
In the end - for me personally - it's less about Christmas and more about the love. Though really, there's probably no sense in separating them, now that I think about it.
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Date: 2009-12-26 07:16 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-12-26 09:38 pm (UTC)