Interesting
Apr. 27th, 2006 10:10 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
falcongrrlLast night at pagan group, someone said, "I just don't think that other people will find me interesting. I'm not interesting. I'm boring."
The two other people chimed in.
"Me either," said one.
"I get so intimidated by people who are interesting," said the other. "I don't know what to say to them. I mean, you can ask them questions, get them to tell you about themselves, but that only goes so far."
"I think I'm interesting to a very small group of people," I said. "Like a niche market. I'm one of those cult movies that some people love to watch over and over again, while others have no interest at all."
I'm still thinking about it, though.
I think people, all people, are fascinating. That said, I honestly don't like people all that much. My tendency is to hide in my cave, crotchety, suspicious. There are a few people who can bring me out...but I don't like organizations. I mistrust the way people act in groups. I sometimes feel like an armadillo among squirrels, in terms of how I relate to the rest of the human race.
But I can't think of any single person who has struck me as boring. I might find their writing or conversation boring, or their perspectives tedious in some way...but they themselves? Not boring. Endlessly fascinating, in fact.
So I don't know what criterion makes other people judge someone as interesting or not interesting or why those mental file folders exist.
I have to think about what makes me want to spend time with other people, and that's tough to quantify. Certainly there's a difference between finding someone interesting and liking them. However, there's also a difference between liking someone and wanting to spend time with them. (Note: for me, online time chatting 'counts.' It's just time, period.) So, for me, in terms of friendship: interesting is irrelevant, liking is more important but still not quite enough, and enjoying your company trumps all.
Interesting.
Anyway, if you comment here, I'll tell you why I find you fascinating...because, undoubtedly, I do.
The two other people chimed in.
"Me either," said one.
"I get so intimidated by people who are interesting," said the other. "I don't know what to say to them. I mean, you can ask them questions, get them to tell you about themselves, but that only goes so far."
"I think I'm interesting to a very small group of people," I said. "Like a niche market. I'm one of those cult movies that some people love to watch over and over again, while others have no interest at all."
I'm still thinking about it, though.
I think people, all people, are fascinating. That said, I honestly don't like people all that much. My tendency is to hide in my cave, crotchety, suspicious. There are a few people who can bring me out...but I don't like organizations. I mistrust the way people act in groups. I sometimes feel like an armadillo among squirrels, in terms of how I relate to the rest of the human race.
But I can't think of any single person who has struck me as boring. I might find their writing or conversation boring, or their perspectives tedious in some way...but they themselves? Not boring. Endlessly fascinating, in fact.
So I don't know what criterion makes other people judge someone as interesting or not interesting or why those mental file folders exist.
I have to think about what makes me want to spend time with other people, and that's tough to quantify. Certainly there's a difference between finding someone interesting and liking them. However, there's also a difference between liking someone and wanting to spend time with them. (Note: for me, online time chatting 'counts.' It's just time, period.) So, for me, in terms of friendship: interesting is irrelevant, liking is more important but still not quite enough, and enjoying your company trumps all.
Interesting.
Anyway, if you comment here, I'll tell you why I find you fascinating...because, undoubtedly, I do.
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-27 03:54 pm (UTC)Speaking of which... I realized that it must not have been obvious at all I was the author of those IM messages while you were AFK the other day, what with my odd screennames; I'm sorry, I should have thought to introduce myself. Hope it didn't spook you much to have some stranger address you like that. :) *hugs!*
(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-27 03:55 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-27 05:06 pm (UTC)And, 'bout your other comment... I wasn't aware there was something particularly French about me (if you except the odd ways in which I sometimes maim the English language), so you'll have to tell me about it. :) I wonder how my idea of what we guys look like from outside matches your own perception, too. If truth be told, I don't have a very good opinion of my country -- but that too, I understand, is typically French. Eh. :)
(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-27 04:06 pm (UTC)