I can meme, can't I?

Five things to bribe me with, other than lots of money. (Then, if you want to, do the meme so I know how to motivate you properly as well. :-))

1. Babysitting - Gods, yes. I think this is self-explanatory.

2. mp3s (I'm a cheap date.)

3. good books (the old fashioned kind, with actual paper, not e-text)

4. something you made for me (preferably something you do well and/or spent lots of time on, unless I gave birth to you, in which case it can be pure crap and it will still probably make it onto the fridge)

5. plane tickets (the only big ticket item, unless someone on my fl works for an airline or has tons of frequent flyer miles saved)

(no subject)

I've been feeling really good lately, perhaps even inexplicably so. I had a wonderful trip, marred only by a bit of emotional angst that has since been mostly-resolved. The trip's helped me to deal with my regular life and routine better, given back some essential part of me that I had lost touch with beforehand.

Now my only question is how to convince Dave that I really need trips like this on a more regular basis. I believe that they're not extravagant extras but things that are truly essential to my overall well-being. But I don't know how to articulate that well--what's more, how to believe I deserve it--when money is as tight as it is. Moreover, I was really lucky in that I didn't spend very much at all on the NY trip, thanks to beetiger and bard_bloom's immense generosity.

I see a lot of people on my fl struggling emotionally right now in some fundamental way. I understand, empathize, so much. I've been struggling too. I guess the difference is that right now I can truly believe that the internal conflict is worth something, that we're all getting somewhere, even if right now it's difficult to see our way through to where that place might be.

I feel hopeful, and even if that hope is without cause, I'll take it. I feel loving, and even if that love is based upon no real justification, I'll keep feeling and showing it anyway. For what else is there?

All I can do is be who I am, no more, no less. That's all any of us can do.

Sometimes, for brief moments in time, it seems like enough.